A Day in Court

Free Entertainment

Any decent sized Irish town provides two totally free diversions to entertain the citizenry. One is the local authority meeting, that is, the town or county council in session. If you want a feel for the way public life is conducted in Ireland, this form of amusement has much to recommend it.

The other public forum of interest is the court system. Ireland has a system of circuit courts to handle lesser crimes and civil proceedings, everything from parking tickets to burglaries and assaults. The judge comes to town and is housed in a suitably imposing premises. The lawyers and their clients gather, local publicans put on extra barmen and waitresses, and the proceedings begin.

The Irish RM

To gain an understanding of the justice system, I attended one whole day's sitting. Among others, I witnessed a 45 minute court case about a poached salmon where the primary evidence was the fish in question, frozen solid and wrapped in newspaper. Four fisheries officers, two lawyers, and a courtroom agonized over the question of precisely how hard it was to remove a fish hook from the salmon's mouth.

Another boyo asked the court to furnish him a legal aid lawyer since he was on welfare and earning only 105 pounds a week. The judge began questioning him. How did he get to court?

"In my car, your honor."
"What year is the car?"
"A new Ford Escort, your honor." (Much laughter since that is a car that cost about 12,000 pounds.)
"That's a good trick. How did you manage that on 105 a week," asks the judge.
The witness launched into a big explanation about gifts from his father-in-law to his wife. "How long have you been married?" asks the judge. The man looked embarrassed. "We're not, your honor."
The judge pressed on. "You're accused of taking two large rolls of insulation from a building site in a van. Whose van was it?"
"Mine, your honor. But, it's three years old."

Then there was the guy who was brought in from prison. When the judge asked him why he was in court, he said "I don't know, your honor. I just came along for the shpin." The judge sent him back to prison, then had to recall the police van when a buried piece of paper revealed the lad was there because he was appealing his conviction! When brought back, the guy replied "Naw, forget it, your honor."

But Does it Work?

Despite these moments of hilarity, the judge dispensed what I have to call very just decisions. Fines, imprisonments, warnings, and homilies were dispensed as appropriate. All in all, I left feeling good about what I witnessed. For a short discussion of crime in Ireland, click here.

That said, I've followed newspaper accounts and stories of the courts handing down ludicrous judgments. Drunk driving, in particular, is treated with a leniency that puts all of us at risk. In our local court, one hit and run drunk driver who had been previously convicted of a similar offence, was given a 9 month jail term after he killed a woman while driving under the influence. And you can read the tale of a judge attempting by fiat to uphold the abuses of the meat cartel. In 2002, an infamous incestual rapist was given a grand total of 3 and 1/2 years jail time for abusing another teenage victim.

Despite such outrages and the obvious need to make penalities for sexual and violent crimes much tougher, it's clear the court system works and is honest and reasonably efficient.

The Four Courts in Dublin - 2 views